Robb's Past - Changes I Made

I was desperate to improve how I looked.

I knew back then I wasn't appealing due to the fact that, I was fat, I was ugly and I was tanned (add that I wasn't born with a golden key in my mouth). Being a gay Chinese guy, all these factors don't make you the most desirable person on earth and I had to do something about my weight, my looks and my complexion as well.

Let's check my weight back then. I weighed at 105kg which is about 231lbs. Yes, I was a baby mammoth. I knew that I was in the obese level as my BMI was at freaking 33!!! There were a few ways I could take to lose weight. Among them are exercising, control of food intake, digging my throat after meals, taking laxative and liposuction.

Exercising is a good way to lose weight if you ask me. However, there was a problem of doing this in UTP. I wasn't motivated enough to exercise in the campus due to the fact I was shy to let people see a piece of blob running around with his fats bouncing up and down when he jogs. In addition, I was tanned, remember? If I'm to jog under the sun, my complexion would go worse. There wasn't any gym available back then (there is now, if I'm not mistaken) and the house compound where we stay aren't very spacious for exercising.

I hate throat digging. It is so wasteful that you pay for your food only to have it vomited out. I will never approve nor do throat digging myself. It's just pure.. wasteful.

Laxative? My my. I didn't want my asshole to feel sore from shitting. I mean, occasion diarrhea is bad enough to make you feel that you can stick a carrot up your ass and make your knees weak but doing it daily just to lose weight? Fuck, no!

Liposuction sounds like a plan. Except that I didn't have the money to do so. Trust me, if I was rich, this would have definitely been my course of action. Lol.

So I was left with control of food intake. As I was used to take at least 4 meals a day, breakfast, lunch, dinner, supper and occasionally double rations in some of them, I tried cutting down to only lunch and dinner with a single ration. After a week, I found that I wasn't making any progress. I was frustrated. I was supposed to lose weight and my weight didn't even budge. Fuck this shit!

I decided to sanction my intake of food to a higher level. 1 meal a day, either lunch or dinner. Yes. It was that extreme. I kept it for another week and I saw a change in my weight. I was half kilograms lighter. I was smiling when I looked at the scale. I knew I've found my right course of action. I kept this up for another 3 weeks. During these 3 weeks, I always have the itch to bite on things on random occasions. I wasn't hungry, but I just wanted to eat. I found the right solution for this itch to bite. Green apples.

I'm not going to explain why green and not red but green apples worked brilliantly for me to suppress my hunger till it was my meal time. I literally consumed an average of 20 green apples or more weekly back then. At the end of the 3 weeks. I was at 100kg. 5 kgs in a month's time.

I was really happy with my progress. At the same time I read somewhere on the Internet that carbs are really fattening compared to protein and they can provide the same amount of energy for your body. Living in Asia, our main source of energy are usually carb based. I knew I couldn't ditch rice and noodles altogether thus I changed my meals to half rations for carb based food and 1 fold increase in protein based food (providing they're cooked in a low fat manner). Thus, this was the refined formula for my weight loss.

1 meal a day, half ration of carb based food, increased ration for protein based food, low fat and lots of green apple.

This formula was applied throughout 6 months. After the first 3 months, the results were getting apparent. My clothes are already getting loose. Some of my friends back then started to get worried if I was taking drugs or something. Lol. I told them I was fine, just losing weight to look better.

An advise for anyone who is currently losing weight but not completely yet. Do NOT buy any new clothes when you're still losing weight. I learned it the hard way back then. I was at size 42 for my waist when I was 105kg. After 3 months of my 'crash diet', my waist was at 36 and I was already crazily shopping for new clothes. And guess what? My weight continue dropping and in the end, all the new clothes I bought are way too big for me to wear again the next 3 months. Validity period - 3 months. Lol!!! Fuck! I was stupid and I hope you peeps who are losing weight out there don't follow my footsteps on this.

At the end of 6 months, I was at 65kg. A drop of 40kgs at the rate of losing 1.67kg a week. I had more excess skin than a lady who just gave birth. Lol. In fact, I still some of them with me now. Fuck! Lol. Here's a little secret I kept all this while when I was losing weight. Starving yourself and suppressing your hunger for 6 months requires a lot of sacrifice. Most of the time, I was just hanging out in my room, because I was too tired to even walk to my lecture halls and tutorial classes. I blamed the sun for being too hot but the true reason was.. I was really really exhausted. So my point is, do not attempt to do what I did especially if you're studying or working. What I did affected my productivity as a student significantly. I might even say that it was one of the reasons that made me lose my interest in continuing my studies in UTP at the first place.

In terms of looks.. well you can't really change how your face is shaped, right? Of course, plastic surgery is a whole different thing. If I can afford this I'd done liposuction as well, right? But I knew a saying that is very very true.

"There is no such thing as an ugly person in the world. They are only lazy"

I tried changing my hairstyle. From going to a cheapskate RM8 Indian barber (yes, I was still cutting my hair at RM8 Indian barber before I lost weight), I went to a salon that charged me RM35 per hair cut. In Ipoh, that price is fucking expensive (cause Ipoh is like a remote village compared to KL). I started to care more about clothing style, colors and etc. I had a lot of trial and error with style of clothing. Take for example, I wore sports headband to classes, bought a lot of clothes from SUB, the black and white Lala shop. Lol. But all in all, I think that kinda went well as I was much better in my looks compared to what I started off with.

As for skin complexion, I couldn't afford SK-II!!! Hahahaha. Thus, I went with what I could afford back then. The cheap Loreal Whitening products. I had a whole bunch of them bought. Facial Wash, Toner, Night Cream, Day Cream, Scrub. All in the Whitening Series. My dad taunted me by calling me a transexual when he saw me buying all these cause all these products were for ladies (Loreal Men didn't exist back then). Lol. I ignored him and made the purchases.

In terms of results, I'd say.. they don't really work that great if your skin complexion is already dark at the first place, but they can help lighten your skin shade and it kinda worked for me a little. Yea, I know I still look quite tanned these days, but trust me, back then, I was worse.

So there you have it. Changes I made on myself after.. Seamus abandoned me due to the fact that I was fat and ugly. Do take note that what I've blogged today are my experience and should you attempt it on your own, I should not be held responsible in anyway because you're not supposed to trust what's written on the Internet at the first place. Lol.

Next update, I'd backtrack a little to introduce a faggot group I was in when I openly embraced my sexuality. I kinda joined the group at the start of my diet plan. Trust me, you'd love reading it. Divas, short & cute but bad attitude top, gossips, backstabbing and many more can be expected from the group. Haha.

Tune in to find out more next.

Cheers
Robb

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